If you think about it in a somewhat abstract way, I suppose the argument could be made that the process of dying begins the day you are born. For some the process is short, for others the process is long, sometimes very long. Sadly, for some it is painful and perhaps even painfully long.
No matter the process, dying is something we must each experience.
Sometimes, when I can't sleep, I lie wondering how I will find out when a loved one passes. Will I be with them when they leave this earthly existence? If not, who will call to tell me the news? It must sound a bit morbid to some, but it's what I think about, sometimes, in the dark, quiet, sleepless, early hours of the day.
When my sweet Mother passed away, Jane, my oldest sister, called to let us know we should come to the hospital quickly because Mom wasn't doing well. I've always appreciated that it wasn't a stranger who called that winter day.
These past few years, whenever the subject of dying would come up with Honey, he would say he didn't want to talk about it and change the subject. His eyes would well with tears and his voice would quiver when he reminisced about his parents, who passed away more than 40 years ago, and his siblings. While in Wyoming, he would begin to fondly reminisce about his childhood and soon, tears would glisten in his eyes, he would stop talking, cough and change the subject.
Sometimes I would broach the subject of dying with Honey because I wanted to learn how he felt. Was he scared? Was he worried it would be painful? Was he worried about where his spirit would go after leaving his body? Was he worried about his wife and children who would be left behind? What was the cause of his fears?
The conversation never worked.
Val & I weren't able to talk with him and reassure him that all would be well. We weren't able to talk about our beliefs (which were his beliefs, too, on a more elementary level) and let him know dying is something we all do and is to be celebrated as much as birth...
In the peaceful setting of his room at home, on a Tuesday afternoon with refreshing Midway breezes and surrounded by his wife and children, LaDell H. Bagley left his earthly existence… July 17, 2012. LaDell was born August 9, 1934 in Fairview, Wyoming to Leah Howell and Oliver A. Bagley.
After making many happy memories with his Star Valley friends, LaDell married his sweetheart Caren Chadwick in 1955 and they were later sealed in the Salt Lake Temple. Shortly after their first son was born, LaDell took his young family to Southern California where he began a career with Sav-on Drug, working his way up to store manager. While in California his family grew, he took up golf and he even hit a hole-in-one!
After his retirement, Dell and Caren moved to Utah, settling in Midway where he and his faithful dogs, Shadow and Lucky, could watch his horses grazing in the field while the beautiful clouds rolled by.
My Father-in-law is gone.
Now, when I can't sleep, I lie wondering how I will find out when a loved one passes. Will I be with them when they leave this earthly existence? If not, who will call to tell me the news? It must sound a bit morbid to some, but it's what I think about, sometimes, in the dark, quiet, sleepless, early hours of the day.